Our Joy

There are so many things we love about our Lydie Joy. Her infectious laugh, her humor, her caring heart.

My little girl started 4-year-old preschool this week. I've been asked if I was sad about letting her go. I honestly can say that I haven't been. Maybe it's because I know she wanted to go so badly. Maybe it's because I know I have been entrusted with her and know it's what her birth mother desired most of all. It's such an honor to be able to provide her with a good education.

Lydie had the most epic fail on the swing set two days before school started.  We decided to walk down to the river and take in some good barbecue and music. We had already had a very full day at Grandma and Grandpa Probert's so we were all a little weary. Lydie's favorite thing is swinging.  Her legs darted as fast as possible to that very big swing.  I was super excited for her because she loves to go as high as possible. I pushed her for a while and then Stephen took over. I was watching Samson play on different equipment when I looked over and saw Lydie swing forward while one hand let go. I yelled at Stephen to do something. It was too late. As she got to the top of the forward motion her body slipped off. Somehow, her legs hooked on and she held on for dear life on the backswing upside down. It almost would have been better if she had completely let go and belly flopped, because the thing that happened next still makes me cringe. Her face scraped the sand covered ground until she came to a stop. She stood up with her mouth, nose, eyes and hair completely packed with sand. She did cry a little but the best thing about Lydie is once we got her orifices cleaned out as best as possible, she was on that swing again.

Later that night when she took a bath, she was blowing tons of sand out her nose and I can't even talk about how much sand I got out of her hair.

Speaking of hair. I don't know why I stress myself as much as I do, but the day before school started, I spent 5 hours on her hair. Why, why why???  When I was done, I wasn't even sure I liked it, but the more I've looked at it, the more I like it. There are 12 cornrows on each side pulled into a ponytail. It was good cornrowing practice for me. I just have to keep telling myself I will get faster.

Lydie talks a lot about the differences in our skin and hair. The conversations have always been initiated by her. A week prior to her starting school, I asked her how she would like her hair for her first day, she replied, "blonde." No matter how much we tell her how cool her hair is or how beautiful her skin is, she still recognizes the differences between us and wants to be the same.

A few weeks ago I had a chance to sit down with Lydie and talk.  Stephen took Samson out for a boy's day out which gave me the perfect opportunity to talk to her about her birth mother. We often look through pictures from Haiti and when we come across a picture of her birth mother, we have not talked much about it. Part of the reason for this is we wanted her to have a clear understanding of the English language so she wouldn't be overly confused by what we were saying and secondly, it's hard to have a conversation when brother is around.

I pulled up the picture and explained how just like our friend has a baby girl in her tummy, the pretty lady in the picture had Lydie in her tummy. At first she said she didn't like it and she didn't like her. She also said she wanted to be in my tummy, which made me cry. I told her I would have liked that too, but that the lady in the picture was her birth mommy. She wanted very badly to see her eyes and closely as she could.  We talked about how beautiful she was and how she looked a lot like Lydie. After our conversation she spent the rest of the day asking to see the pictures over and over.  I was so glad we had the conversation and we pray every day that she finds her identity in Christ and loves and accepts our differences.